Category: Trauma

Navigating Misattunement in Relationships

Misattunement in relationships can be a tricky, yet enlightening, experience. It occurs when there’s a disconnect or lack of synchronization between people’s emotional and psychological states. Imagine dancers stepping on each other’s toes instead of gracefully moving in harmony. This discord can manifest in various forms, such as misunderstandings, unmet needs, or feeling unheard and unseen. It’s a common phenomenon, and recognizing it is the first step towards creating more attuned and fulfilling connections.

One of the key aspects to addressing misattunement is fostering open and empathetic communication. It’s about being present and genuinely trying to understand your partner’s perspective, even if it differs from your own. This requires a playful curiosity and a willingness to explore each other’s inner worlds without judgment.

By asking questions, sharing feelings honestly, and really listening, you can begin to bridge the gap that misattunement creates. It’s a collaborative effort, where both partners contribute to building a stronger, more empathetic bond.

Misattunement is not the end of the world—in fact, it’s quite the opposite. These moments are opportunities to learn more about each other and deepen your connection. Embrace the process creatively; perhaps through shared activities that encourage mutual understanding or simply by making space for regular check-ins.

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What is Secure Relating?

Secure relating refers to a a state of mind, a healthy and balanced way of connecting with yourself and others in relationships. It involves the following qualities: emotional regulation, autonomy, empathy and compassion, effective communication, trust and reliability, adaptability, boundaries, and conflict.

Developing secure relating starts with self-awareness. Recognizing your emotional patterns helps you respond thoughtfully even as you feel activation in your system. Self-compassion and self-acceptance are crucial foundations for extending these qualities to others. It encourages growth and connection, allowing both individuals to be their true selves. In their book, Secure Relating: Holding Your Own in an Insecure World, Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott talk about being the right size for you, not shrinking to fit in or puffing up and being bigger.

Ultimately, secure relating leads to deeper, more fulfilling relationships. By cultivating it, you create a positive and nurturing environment for yourself and those around you.

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Cultivating Body Trust: A Journey of Radical Self-Love

In a world inundated with diet culture and fat phobia, reclaiming body trust can feel like a radical act of self-love. Reconnecting with your body means recognizing it as your ally, not an adversary. Hilary Kinavy and Dana Sturtevant’s book, Reclaiming Body Trust: Break Free from a Culture of Body Perfection, Disordered Eating & Other Traumas, outlines the foundations of Body Trust, including working the edges of your comfort zone, finding community, observing with kindness and curiosity, embracing imperfection, and honoring your resources. These principles help you return to your body, your home.

Similar to a meditation practice where getting distracted and losing focus is common, cultivating and healing body trust comes from repeatedly returning to these foundations, no matter how often you stray from the path. It’s about acknowledging that straying is part of the process and that each return strengthens your connection with your body.

Reclaiming body trust is a personal and ongoing journey. Be patient with yourself and celebrate small victories. Your body is wise and resilient. Trust it, collaborate with it—it’s your lifelong companion.

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What is Somatic Ecotherapy?

Somatic Ecotherapy tunes into the inner wisdom of the body and senses and involves integrating the outdoors and the natural world as a mechanism of healing and transformation.Being outdoors has many benefits including stress reduction, relaxation, improved mood, a greater sense of peace and increased self-confidence. Somatic Ecotherapy helps create a sense of stability, grounding and connection, and can help contain and transform difficult and powerful emotions and experiences.

Through practices such as mindfulness, breathwork, and body awareness, Somatic Ecotherapy encourages individuals to listen to the subtle messages of their bodies and tap into their innate wisdom. This process not only helps in managing stress and anxiety but also cultivates a deep sense of presence and self-acceptance. By embracing the outdoors as a sacred space for healing and transformation, Somatic Ecotherapy offers a holistic approach to well-being that addresses the interconnectedness of mind, body, and spirit. It is a gentle yet powerful modality that honors the resilience and healing potential that lies within each of us.

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Navigating Mother’s Day Grief: Finding Comfort Amidst Loss

Mother’s Day can be a vivid reminder for those grieving their relationship with their mom. The absence of something gets your attention and it’s both upsetting and confusing. Acknowledge your emotions; it’s okay to feel what is present for you. 

There’s a lot of pressure to have the relationship with your mother look or be a certain way. Give yourself permission to not be hard on yourself. Instead, practice some self-care and self-compassion. Take time for self-care; engage in activities that bring solace and comfort, whether it’s journaling, meditation, or a leisurely walk. If it’s available to you, surround yourself with supportive friends or family members who understand and validate your feelings. Reach out for professional support if needed; therapy can provide a safe space to explore complex emotions. 

Remember, grief can be mysterious, distressing, and complicated. Be gentle with yourself and take time to learn and understand how you experience grief in your mind, body, and heart.

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Somatic Experiencing®: Healing Trauma and Stress

Recognizing how past traumas and stress affect the body can be a valuable resource in resolving the symptoms of stress and trauma. One of the core tenants of somatic-oriented work is that the body possesses its own wisdom and can lead us towards healing if we listen to it.

Somatic Experiencing® (SE) is a technique that assists individuals in addressing and releasing stored trauma in the body. By focusing on bodily sensations and physical experiences, SE aims to regulate the nervous system and restore a sense of safety and equilibrium. SE commonly includes methods like body scanning, where individuals tune into different body parts to identify tension, and grounding exercises to foster connection and presence in the moment.

Incorporating somatic healing into daily life can be a powerful practice. Simple activities such as mindful breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or gentle stretching can help individuals maintain a connection with their bodies and enhance a feeling of calmness and well-being. By integrating somatic practices into your routine, you can develop a deeper understanding of your body and emotions, promoting resilience and self-care.

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Healing Trauma: Navigating the Journey with Understanding and Care

Trauma is a complex and deeply personal experience that can have a profound impact on individuals. It is essential to approach the topic of trauma with empathy, understanding, and sensitivity. While the effects of trauma can be long-lasting and challenging, it is important to remember that healing is possible.

While talking about your experiences and emotions can be a significant part of the healing process, it may sometimes trigger negative feelings and worsen the situation. It’s essential to take the time to understand what feeling safe and comfortable means to you. This resource will be essential as you navigate through the healing journey.

It is also important to recognize that healing from trauma is a journey that looks different for everyone. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, and it is okay to take your time and be patient with yourself. Remember, you are not alone in your experiences, and there are resources and communities available to support you along the way.

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